Cold analytical anger, because it takes all kinds

It took me seven years of activism more or less — from 1970 to 1977 — to control and channel my adolescent anger and arrogance.

A personal rant
A personal rant with political overtones

It was hard enough, especially for a teenage activist who saw up close the Marcosian state violence that claimed the lives of fellow street marchers and, under martial law, comrades in the underground. It was an extra challenge, for one who believed he had all the answers in his hands and had the right to lash out at anyone who questioned his political and ideological beliefs.

Let me get that right: This doesn’t mean that angry activism automatically leads to arrogance or blind, brash action. They don’t. This also didn’t mean that, prior to 1977, I was a seething, roiling cauldron of dysfunctional behavior that exploded and splattered onto other people, hurting them in random ways. I wasn’t. Continue reading “Cold analytical anger, because it takes all kinds”

Firecrackers: A self-destructive Pinoy addiction?

Firing an ancient Chinese rocket
Firing a rocket, from "History of ancient Chinese fireworks' invention," http://www.buzzle.com/images/history/gunpowder-filled-bamboo-firework.jpg

(Originally published on GMA News Online website. See author’s note here.)

It was 11:45 p.m. on December 31, 1972, the first New Year’s Eve after Ferdinand Marcos declared martial law. Like countless others across the country, our clan was gathered at the old family house, but sensed some uneasy quiet since the martial law government had imposed a total firecrackers ban.

My childhood memories of New Year’s Eve had always been one of rambunctious revelry in yards and streets, with neighbors weaving in and out of each others’ homes amid a wall-to-wall din of firecrackers, tooting horns, and the clangor of kitchen pots and pans. But this time, we and our neighbors—big fans of street explosions—faced the prospect of a silenced New Year’s Eve.

Our fears turned out to be unfounded. At about five minutes before midnight, a staccato of explosions started to roll in from the city’s general background noise, mounting into the familiar crescendo we all knew. Continue reading “Firecrackers: A self-destructive Pinoy addiction?”

Four years with no television, and thankful for it

What I did was something long strived for but not really premeditated, like when I stopped smoking nearly 20 years ago. I mean, the fact that I have now passed four years without any television at home, was an event as natural as the breaking dawn. It simply happened, almost without my even noticing it. It was not the result of a formal decision and setting a phaseout schedule or cut-off date.  Continue reading “Four years with no television, and thankful for it”